Collision

My story began just like many other little girls in the 1970's.  Once upon a time, my heart's desire was to be a mommy.  I dreamt of a prince who would come along on a white horse and carry me of into the sunset.  We would fall in love and get married.  It would be a grand affair in front of a large crowd.  Family and friends from all over the kingdom would gather to celebrate the occasion.  At the end of the day, a white carriage would roll up boasting a sign saying "Just Married" and we would climb in, Mr. & Mrs., ready to begin our lifelong journey.  Shortly after honeymooning in a warm, tropical place, we would start a family. Babies!  Babies!  Babies!  Lots of babies....twelve, if I remember right.  Twelve little girls, all sugar and spice and everything nice because that is just what the prince and I would want.

Fast forward twenty years....

My heart's desire was still to be mommy. 

My prince did come along, in a beat up black FORD Bronco.

We did ride off into the sunset right after our first date, in the back of that black Bronco, on the way to the ER.  My head had been cracked open in a knee boarding accident.

We did fall in love and we did get married.  No grand affair, just a small ceremony on a cold, drab, March evening.  At the end of the evening, a white Cadillac pulled up boasting a "Just Married" sign and we did climb in, Mr. & Mrs., to begin our lifelong journey. 

We honeymooned at Universal Studios in Florida, not a warm, tropical place, but lovely nonetheless.

Shortly after honeymooning, we did start a family.  Fair Maiden L.K., a precious baby girl, was born followed eighteen months later by Kind-Hearted Warrior S.T., a precious baby boy.  After some time, True Princess G.A., another precious baby girl arrived.  Years passed.  My prince and I were parents to three, not twelve, of the most beautiful children in the kingdom and we loved them dearly.  Being a wife and mother filled my life with purpose and passion.  It is what I loved the most.

It is at this point in our journey where the collision happened.  We yearned for more.  More babies.  Our heart's desire collided with the passion of God and His love for the orphan.  Child number 4 and child number 5 would not be born of my body, but rather grown in our hearts.  Child number 4 and child number 5 would be adopted.

On the day of our homestudy, the social worker asked a question, "Do you have a gender preference for the children you will be adopting?"  I was quiet for a minute.  My prince spoke up first. 

"Yes.  Boys, both boys.  We would like two sons."

Unlike the prince in my childhood fairytale, this prince did not dream of having twelve girls...sugar and spice and everything nice.  His heart's desire was for boys...snips and snails and puppy dog tails. 

As we celebrate family and the love we have for our mothers this Mother's Day weekend , let's be mindful of the 147 million orphans in the world living day after day without a mother's love.  Of the children living in the world's orphanages, the girls are chosen first and the boys keep waiting...and waiting...and waiting. 

Today, my childhood dream collides with reality.  I will not have twelve girls.  I will have two girls and three boys.  Every boy needs a mother and as a grown up, my heart's desire is to live the adventure of raising boys. 

Dear Thunder and Lightning,

Sweet baby boy, Lightning, I long to hold you in my arms, kiss your cheeks, and sing you a sweet lullaby. I look forward to the days that we will go to the park, squish our hands in fingerpaint, roll a ball to each other in the backyard, splash in the bathtub, take a wagon ride down the dirt road, collect seashells on the beach, visit the petting zoo, and eat roasted marshmallows from the campfire because every boy needs a mother. 

Sweet big boy, Thunder, I long to snuggle you in my arms, kiss your cheeks, and read you one of my favorite bedtime stories.  We will laugh and we will play.  I look forward to the days that we will swing on the playground swings and built forts in the backyard.  We will make castles in the sandbox, ride bikes down the dirt road, sculpt playdough into funky shapes, splash in the big waves at the beach, ride ponies at the petting zoo, and make smores around the campfire because every boy needs a mother. 

There is a place in my life that only the two of you can fill.  I am coming.  If I could be there tomorrow, it wouldn't be soon enough.  For now, I must wait.   I am waiting with great anticipation because I love you both and you belong here with me...in my arms...in my life.  I am yours and you are mine...together we will live a life of adventure. 

Snips, snails, and puppy dog tails, forever, because every boy needs a mother!
 
Hugs and kisses from Mommy