Fair Maiden, Kind-Hearted Warrior, and True Princess are all dynamically immersed in school work and school functions, basketball practices, football games, birthday parties, and church activities which in turn keeps this CrAzY Momma dynamically immersed as well.
The layers of the onion that I call 'the Migrant Ministry 2011' keep getting peeled back to expose an odor and a stench that absolutely brings tears to my eyes. The circumstances of these children's lives S.T.I.N.K. and the system's response to their needs is depressing and unfair to say the least. This is the single most heartbreaking pit I have ever been in. It is deep and dark crowded by cultural misconceptions and ugly prejudice. The walls are crumbling. I keep clawing up the sides trying to climb out with the children in tow, but I keep falling backwards and sinking deeper. I refuse to climb out by myself and leave the weary and lost behind. I refuse to bring myself back to safety and leave the least of these in that evil pit of prostitution, drugs, and abuse. It is a heavy load that I am carrying. Day after day I wonder if anyone can hear the cries. Does anyone care that we need help? Is anyone willing to reach down into the damp darkness and bring us, all of us, up into the light? Can you hear me? Are you listening? I refuse to leave them behind. I refuse.
Business is booming despite the hurting economy in our state. With the mixed blessing of more work comes more problems. Knight-in-Shining Armor is being pulled like taffy in many different directions. Sanity is in short supply as he navigates the narrow highway balancing his faith, his family, and his job. In lieu of all of his responsibilities, he remains a rock...a strong leader and an inspiring example of commitment and excellence.
And right in the middle of it all runs the twisted Adoption Highway weaving in and out of our lives with one blind curve after another. Our adoption agency shared with us that all families whom have dossiers in Honduras regardless of their place in the process (meaning those just arriving in the country for translation or those in the review process or those approved and awaiting a signature or those already on the wait list) are now being required to submit blood work, urinalysis, and fecal studies for any and all children residing in the home. Already contained in our dossier is a statement from our pediatrician that he has examined each of our three children and found them to be healthy and completely immunized.
IHNFA's request for lab work to be done on healthy children is, quite frankly, irrational and has no medical basis. To add insult to injury, the cost of these tests will be an out-of-pocket expense for us meaning that they will not be covered by our current health insurance provider.
When inquiring about exactly what tests were necessary and what "general" referred to and if there was anything that they (IHNFA) specifically wanted tested, our agency issued the following staement as IHNFA's response, "We (IHNFA) are not doctors. They (the families) need to call their doctors and ask."
Our agency has also stated that IHNFA is not asking for HIV, TB, Hep B, or syphillis.
Given this information, our doctor has declared that he cannot and will not request labs be done on healthy children who have no past or present signs or symptoms of any communicable diseases or intestinal parasites. We support our doctor in his rational assessment of this request and we have chosen to support his plan of action at this point. He has placed a TB test on each child and written an affidavit supporting the choices he has made not to comply otherwise.
Today I walked by the calendar and noticed that when the page was turned to November, I no longer logged the number of days that our dossier has been in Honduras...one hundred and fifty plus days? The calendar no longer highlights the weeks that our dossier has been in the hands of IHNFA...fourteen plus weeks? It no longer catalogs the days since we have been approved and have been waiting for a signature to get us on the national wait list...sixty plus days? I paused a moment and realized that I no longer stand and stare wistfully at the days on the calendar and wonder if today is THE day that IT will happen.
Supernaturally, without me even being aware, I have been dynamically immersed and the desire for control over this situation is gone. Time is flying by and I am now looking at each day for what DID happen, not what DIDN'T. There is freedom in being completely immersed in the daily doings of life...completely empowered by what I do have...a faithful God and a loving family. There is freedom knowing that I am not disabled by what I do not have.
God is able and, humbly, through Him, so am I.
I am able to find joy and contentment despite my circumstances.
I am able to be patient despite my circumstances. I am full of hope despite my circumstances.
Thank you, Almighty God, for your mercies that are new every day and your grace that is sufficient.