(Friday)
The first and only behavior issue we have faced so far was at bedtime last night when Lightning refused to get into bed and refused to let anyone hold him or comfort him. He whimpered, then settled himself down on the floor in front of the bathroom door and refused to move or be moved. I sat beside him quietly repeating kind and encouraging words....telling him I loved him, but he would adamantly reply, "NO!". Oddly enough, he grew even more agitated when I tried to get up and leave him alone. So, I stayed beside him and rubbed his back in silence. He eventually fell asleep and Papa carried him to his bed where he slept beside Thunder. He slept the whole night through, waking up bright eyed and bushy tailed, ready for a new day...no evidence of the stress from the night before.
The boys are absolute darlings, so affectionate, easy going, and fun. They love to show off their good manners and they are very good helpers. On occasion, one or the other of them will be stubborn and refuse to do what we ask. We stop them immediately and ask for a re-do thereby giving them a second chance to choose a better behavior or answer leading to the desired outcome. Each and every time, they have made the right choice in behavior and are pleased to follow up with a high-five and a hug.
(Saturday)
We were prepared for them not to eat for a couple of days...NOT so!!! They eat, and they eat well.
We were informed that Lightning wakes up like a grumpy bear...NOT so!!! He wakes up with giggles and hugs and a smile from ear to ear. He is a chatterbox, and he also loves to sing. He is happy, happy, happy. He loves to swim. He enjoys doing puzzles and sorting types of games as well as play doh. He is fascinated with dogs. He comes to me many times a day calling "Mama! Mama! Un abrazo! Un beso!" (he wants hugs and kisses) His giggle is contagious and really gets going when he plays with Papa. He repeatedly climbs into Papa's lap, puts his head on his shoulder, and pats his back over and over "Mi Papa...Mi Papa".
Thunder is handsome and athletic and loving. He has a wonderful position in the family making fast friends with True Princess because they are the same age, but he also keeps up with Fair Maiden and Kind Hearted Warrior. He is theatrical and really loves watching movies. He makes every effort to be helpful and has become protective of his mama...like when others are spraying her with ice cold pool water, he jumps in front of her and says, "NOT on my Mama!". He loves his Papa more than any other and can often be found by his side holding his hand or sitting on his lap or hugging his neck. He is learning to play card games and American football. He tells us many times a day in English, "I love you so much. I am so happy!"
We have moved into a beautiful apartment in Cali and LOVE it. We have a kitchen, a utility room, three bathrooms, two bedrooms, a dining room, and a family room. We have a personal water tank filled with drinking water, a great wi-fi connection, and access to the roof top pool. We have complete house keeping services. The staff is wonderful!
A great mall is just a block away. One floor is a grocery store. One is a food court, one has movie theaters, and several are retail with many, many ATM machines. It is part of our daily routine to go to the market for that days food. The boys love it, and for a mere $2 US, a delivery boy will bring the groceries to our room and unload them...SUPER service. We ordered meat from the deli our first day there and forgot to back and pick it up before we left. An hour later, a market employee was at the door with our order that we had paid for, but not received!
Though we did go to the park and a large mall yesterday afternoon, we have spent most of our time in the apartment doing puzzles, watching movies, cooking (the boys are very interested!), swimming, playing games, and just being together. It is such an easygoing time.
Bedtime last night was much different from the night before. The boys happily took baths, put on p.j.'s, and climbed into bed. Lightning's melt down was about to start when he arched his back refusing to lay in bed. I was sitting on the bed. Instead of opting for the floor, he climbed into my arms and put his head on my shoulder. I rocked. Thunder watched. This night Lightning WANTED me. He let me whisper sweet nothings in his ear and rub his back. I started to sing. I felt him melt into my arms. At the same time Thunder threw off his covers and laid on his his stomach inching closer to me. I was able to lay Lightning down and rub both boys backs as I serenaded them with good night lullabies. Sweet dreams, my littles...sweet dreams....
Our meeting at ICBF is scheduled for Thursday morning at 8:30. Then Knight-in-Shining Armor, King Hearted Warrior, and True Princess leave us on Saturday. We know the name of our attorney and have been told that we are in very good hands.
The first and only behavior issue we have faced so far was at bedtime last night when Lightning refused to get into bed and refused to let anyone hold him or comfort him. He whimpered, then settled himself down on the floor in front of the bathroom door and refused to move or be moved. I sat beside him quietly repeating kind and encouraging words....telling him I loved him, but he would adamantly reply, "NO!". Oddly enough, he grew even more agitated when I tried to get up and leave him alone. So, I stayed beside him and rubbed his back in silence. He eventually fell asleep and Papa carried him to his bed where he slept beside Thunder. He slept the whole night through, waking up bright eyed and bushy tailed, ready for a new day...no evidence of the stress from the night before.
The boys are absolute darlings, so affectionate, easy going, and fun. They love to show off their good manners and they are very good helpers. On occasion, one or the other of them will be stubborn and refuse to do what we ask. We stop them immediately and ask for a re-do thereby giving them a second chance to choose a better behavior or answer leading to the desired outcome. Each and every time, they have made the right choice in behavior and are pleased to follow up with a high-five and a hug.
(Saturday)
We were prepared for them not to eat for a couple of days...NOT so!!! They eat, and they eat well.
We were informed that Lightning wakes up like a grumpy bear...NOT so!!! He wakes up with giggles and hugs and a smile from ear to ear. He is a chatterbox, and he also loves to sing. He is happy, happy, happy. He loves to swim. He enjoys doing puzzles and sorting types of games as well as play doh. He is fascinated with dogs. He comes to me many times a day calling "Mama! Mama! Un abrazo! Un beso!" (he wants hugs and kisses) His giggle is contagious and really gets going when he plays with Papa. He repeatedly climbs into Papa's lap, puts his head on his shoulder, and pats his back over and over "Mi Papa...Mi Papa".
Thunder is handsome and athletic and loving. He has a wonderful position in the family making fast friends with True Princess because they are the same age, but he also keeps up with Fair Maiden and Kind Hearted Warrior. He is theatrical and really loves watching movies. He makes every effort to be helpful and has become protective of his mama...like when others are spraying her with ice cold pool water, he jumps in front of her and says, "NOT on my Mama!". He loves his Papa more than any other and can often be found by his side holding his hand or sitting on his lap or hugging his neck. He is learning to play card games and American football. He tells us many times a day in English, "I love you so much. I am so happy!"
We have moved into a beautiful apartment in Cali and LOVE it. We have a kitchen, a utility room, three bathrooms, two bedrooms, a dining room, and a family room. We have a personal water tank filled with drinking water, a great wi-fi connection, and access to the roof top pool. We have complete house keeping services. The staff is wonderful!
A great mall is just a block away. One floor is a grocery store. One is a food court, one has movie theaters, and several are retail with many, many ATM machines. It is part of our daily routine to go to the market for that days food. The boys love it, and for a mere $2 US, a delivery boy will bring the groceries to our room and unload them...SUPER service. We ordered meat from the deli our first day there and forgot to back and pick it up before we left. An hour later, a market employee was at the door with our order that we had paid for, but not received!
Though we did go to the park and a large mall yesterday afternoon, we have spent most of our time in the apartment doing puzzles, watching movies, cooking (the boys are very interested!), swimming, playing games, and just being together. It is such an easygoing time.
Bedtime last night was much different from the night before. The boys happily took baths, put on p.j.'s, and climbed into bed. Lightning's melt down was about to start when he arched his back refusing to lay in bed. I was sitting on the bed. Instead of opting for the floor, he climbed into my arms and put his head on my shoulder. I rocked. Thunder watched. This night Lightning WANTED me. He let me whisper sweet nothings in his ear and rub his back. I started to sing. I felt him melt into my arms. At the same time Thunder threw off his covers and laid on his his stomach inching closer to me. I was able to lay Lightning down and rub both boys backs as I serenaded them with good night lullabies. Sweet dreams, my littles...sweet dreams....
Our meeting at ICBF is scheduled for Thursday morning at 8:30. Then Knight-in-Shining Armor, King Hearted Warrior, and True Princess leave us on Saturday. We know the name of our attorney and have been told that we are in very good hands.
don't give up.. our little 5 yr old had the same bedtime struggles, but eventually faded. singing too also helped him calm. i can't believe how they mirror Justin's exact behavior. wow..it was surreal reading your blog. hard stuff. hang in there. they want you to prove your love and it is often when our patience is tried the most. love to you and your family.
ReplyDeleteI have really enjoyed reading your blog, your words bring hope to other adoptive families that are still in the process. It's very comforting knowing the feelings we have are not "abnormal" and there are other that are going through what we are right now. My wife and I are in the same Gladney Colombia program, and waiting for our dossier to be approved by ICBF. Will be praying for your family as you continue on the journey.
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